“Addicted to Suffering: The Invisible Hustle” u1k6f

In this deeply revealing episode of the Clean Your Toilet Podcast, host Ming sits down with...

In this deeply revealing episode of the Clean Your Toilet Podcast, host Ming sits down with Julian—a media entrepreneur, coach, and someone whose success story includes burnout, divorce, personal reinvention, and a brutally honest reckoning with the self.


This is not a TED Talk on success. This is not a productivity hack session.


This is a conversation about:
The hidden costs of achievement and ambition
How childhood narratives quietly shape adult self-worth
The unspoken addiction to “doing more” to prove your value
Why we cling to suffering as an identity
What it takes to actually change — not just talk about change


Julian opens up about the years he spent equating effort with value, productivity with love, and burnout with worthiness. As he shares his journey through entrepreneurial highs, personal lows, and a long-overdue divorce, Ming peels back the layers on why many high-functioning adults secretly feel empty, resentful, or stuck — even when they “have it all.”


Key themes explored:
Why the person sabotaging your joy might be you
The illusion of being “too busy” to do inner work
How unprocessed pain bleeds into leadership, company culture, and relationships
Finding your worth outside of titles, output, and external validation
The moment when you realize your dream life is built on survival patterns
How to let go without giving up


This isn’t a clean journey. It’s a messy one.


This episode is for anyone who’s quietly questioning the way they’ve been living — and wondering what might happen if they stop proving and start being.


Big takeaway:
You can’t clean your life with the same energy that made it messy.